Jul 052012
 

So my 5 year-old son is a bit anal retentive. I can’t tell you the number of times he’s complained about his tummy hurting. Then I count the number of days since his last BM and know. Yes, I keep track of when he goes BM. Well, I used to before I started school this semester.

You see, everyone in my family is a bit anal retentive about public BMs. During the regular school year, my little guy went to preschool during the day and after-school care in the evening. So, most of his BMs were when I was home with him. Now that it’s summer time, he’s out of school (my daughter watches him during the day), while I’m at school. So he can sneak those BMs in while I’m not at home. And of course, my daughter IS NOT interested in her little brother’s irregularity. Would you blame her? 🙂

Last weekend my son started complaining about tummy aches again. He was really holding it in this time. I sent him to the bathroom and thought he’d taken care of business, but the next day the complaints started again at church. “Go to the bathroom, now!” So he went and came out, saying how he DIDN’T go again.

To tell you the truth, I can understand his apprehension about the BM thing. Honestly, I hate going myself. The whole experience is entirely unpleasant. But… we’re humans. And unlike Kim Jong Il, a human’s got to do what a human’s got to do.

We head out to brunch, and he’s STILL complaining. He even took a trip to the bathroom at the restaurant but came back still full of… well, you know.

Yes, I know at the table is not the place to discuss BMs, but I’d seriously had enough. So I told him about the story of the guy who ended up in the hospital because intestines burst when he didn’t go poop on a regular basis. He had to have a sack attached to the hole in his side to collect his poop. Who knows if he survived… Injuries like that are easy to get infected.

I know my husband was angry listening to the story with his piece of sausage on the plate. haha Stop it… it’s not funny. But you know what? My son got up from the table and headed to bathroom. A bit later, he returned (walking only a little funny) with a half smile on his face.

“Does your tummy still hurt?” I asked.
“Nope.”
“I told you it would help.” Yes… I’m that person who doesn’t hesitate to say I told you so.

It’s been half a week, and we’ve had no tummy aches. Woot! Today he came out of the bathroom (without being told to go, mind you) and said he’d done the deed. Then he added, something about how he’s a big boy and not going to hold it in any more because it’ll blow up, and he’ll die.

Oops! So, I’ve (literally) scared the crap out of my little man. Okay… maybe burst was a strong word, BUT! I’m serious about the guy landing in the hospital. He’d been constipated for awhile before his colon perforated. And holding it in like my boy was doing could lead to a fecal impaction. I’m not crazy people!

I feel a little (minuscule) bad about scaring him, but at least I don’t have to spike my boys food with stool softeners or shove suppositories up his hind end in order to force him to do the right thing. Plus, he won’t have to worry about going around with a colostomy bag.

If you have an anal retentive child, feel free to tell him the story about the guy with the burst colon. It worked for my son.
Thanks for stopping by for this episode of TMI. And be thankful I didn’t include pictures. 😀

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